Gadgetory

hi did you know that was just one crab a day you can help 2.3 billion people who don't have access to one of these just one crap a day just one crap a day one crap a day what just one crap a day just one crop a day so easy who gives a crap toilet paper donate 50 percent of their profits to help build toilets for those in need and it's recycled just one clever day just one just one one do it for the kids sometimes to stand up for someone in me you have to sit down and do it with this thank you bye father Christmas oh ah hi I didn't mean to wake you was just trying to find a loo it wasn't you it's that stench I'm sorry Gary dude what go back to sleep I was shaming of shit Oakland then Along Came the ghost of Christmas ah listen just just give me a second okay and I'll wrap this right up yeah oh jeez not anything Nicholas please girls go back to bed keep dropping Yule logs down his chimney come on now a little privacy would be great I've been holding this thing since Dubai the house smells like a gingerbread man Walter I'm sorry it's the milk and cookies okay every year destroys me well none of your hair jumping lumps of coal in our toilet what did you get me for Christmas okay great I don't make a meal of it okay it's not that bad look good I found Jesus there's another one whoa put that back looking around for that portable Finch it's under the tree that's not for you all right as soon as I'm done here I'm gonna get those gifts badly and you're all going on the naughty list oh yeah then I can put your Instagram hashtag You Know Who I am you have any idea put it in the cloud with it thank you thought you can't blackmail Santa look Kringle you never should have pinched off a hot slice of fruitcake without using poo curry poopourri peppery the gift that stops thinking since we're exchanging gifts here's one for you next time it's Prince the ball before you go and no one else will ever know so you can keep sneaking without reaching and your dingleberries will smell like jingle berries everyone else yeah Santa hurry up I really need to take us this is where your ice cream comes from all creamy poop of a mystic unicorn totally clean totally cool and soft-serve straight from a finger mm-hmm they're good at pooping but you know such a pooping you do this is when you sit on a porcelain throne it's muscle to kink in the hose and stop some Ben and Jerry's from sliding out smoothly is that a problem I don't know I hemorrhoids a problem sitting at this angle can cause hemorrhoids bloating constipation and a bunch of other crap seriously you know clone hemorrhoids the glitter hits everywhere what what happens when you go from sit to squat well arm is muscle relaxant at kinko's away faster than Pegasus neighing sweet sherbet Dookie now your curl in Zeeland and ready for battle that's because our bodies were made to poop in a squat and now there's a product that you squat in your own home introducing the squadron's Holly no squatty potty is not a joke and yes it will give you the best cup of your life guaranteed I don't just mean you bloated Laden hemorrhoidal ladies I mean everyone King Kong King pink honking it's simple science really can't get the last scoop out of the carton with a squatty potty you get complete elimination spend too much time on the chamber plus the squatty potty makes you go twice as fast so your money very cool I scream you scream and clock club baby maybe you're sore from squeezing out solid globs of rocky road the squatty potty business smooth stream of bro yo that glides like a vergence wad plus when you're done it tucks neatly out of sight thanks to its innovative patented design truly a foot stool fit for a constipated King so order your squatty potty today I'm not saying it will make your poop as soft as this cookies and cream but I'm not saying it won't squatty potty the stool for better stool pooping will never be the same and neither will I scream I want to yield how does it taste is that delicious said the best thing you've ever had in your life there you are they say this is good luck but good luck or not it's still a mess and a mess like this can't be clean with just paper you need water to get the job done right whether you're cleaning your car or your hands so why when it comes to that do we use just toilet paper bathroom goers meet your new best friend clap oh sorry Pete not you buddy bathroom goers meet your new best friend the swash 1400s it's a new seat for the toilet you already have that will give your butt the royal treatment it deserves with a heated seat dual positionable stainless steel nozzles adjustable warm water spray at the touch of a button and a warm air dryer your butt will think you've died and gone you get it so what's so great about bran Del's new swash bidet seat it's simple wash don't wipe it uses water to clean the messes that can't be clean with just paper he's always doing stuff like that and with bran Del's bidet Ct can because it has a citable lid you think that'd be standard issue at the day toilet seats right wrong unlike most bidet seat lids rondelle supports a person's weight meaning Pete can use it however he wants another great feature stainless steel nozzles they're positionable because they got to hit you in just the right spot and there's self-sterilizing I mean they're washing my butt they're washing Pete's butt move you got to make sure those things are clean man what's up Pete oh yeah that's another feature of rondelle's new seat it has a nightlight did I mention Braun bells nice wash the day seat has customizable memory settings that means I press one button and get the seat temperature nozzle position and water temperature I want I don't have to remember anything because my swash does it for me are you kidding me I think it's pretty clear now to everyone that when it comes to this stuff wash don't wipe I dropped the brake in the toilet yesterday my girlfriend was watching I got super kitchen toilet I dropped a brake never toilet in our house I dropped a brick this big it's crazy I talked to bricks in the toilet but then I took one out and put it in the toilet upstairs it brick I dropped with the same size as my dad you want to see you I can see light in here my brick was so big the toilet filled up with less water I saved water by dropping a brick in the toilet if we all drop a brick in our toilets will say a California 67 million gallons of water a day in a state that's facing its worst drought in history to go into your bathroom muster up a brick and plop it into the top tank feels great yep